What If?
by DearP
Summary: What if Edward couldn't help but to drink Bella's blood after meeting her? What if he took her to the woods, and did his job? But... what if Bella didn't really die? Rating may change :D Discontinued, sorry. There'll be no ending for this story.
1. Chapter 1

_**What If**_

_**Twilight FanFiction Chapter 1**_

A/N: Hi!! I'm so excited! This is my second FanFiction, and it's just an idea that occurred last night… so please give it a try!

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"Hi, I'm Edward Cullen" he said, almost whispering, as the bell rang and we started to pack our books. Wait, was he really talking to me? I thought he hated me. He looked like he was going to kill me, just some minutes ago. "What is your next period?" he said, flashing a dazzling smile in my direction.

I couldn't think right for some seconds. He was still looking at me, waiting for my answer. I grabbed my schedule in my backpack and took a quick look.

"Gym" I said, not looking up from my schedule. He was so handsome. In a weird way, just like his family. They were too beautiful, not from this world. But the weirdest thing was that I liked it. I felt an impulse to be near him.

"Great, that's my next period too. Would you mind if I walked you to the classroom?" he asked me in that same dazzling tone. How could I decline that offer? I wanted to cause a good impression, and discover why he had that murderous expression on his face before.

"Sure" I said, looking around. We were the last ones that still were in the classroom. Edward walked through the door, and I followed him, tripping on the open door, but not falling. He was walking too fast, I almost couldn't keep up with him. I let him lead and wondered my thoughts. Why was he so eager to take me to my next period? One minute before that, I was asking myself if he hated me, wondering what had I done wrong.

"So, Bella, why did you move to forks? And how do you like it until now?" he asked with an almost silent hint of anger mixed with the casual tone of his voice. I could notice that hint, and returned to thinking that he was just being nice to the new girl, nothing special.

I didn't want to talk about how I left Renee and how I knew that I wouldn't like living here. But I was a terrible liar.

"My mother married again, and I thought it would be good to spend some quality time with Char- my dad" I said, looking at my feet while walking. It was only then that I realized that we were headed to the forest. But Edward kept asking questions.

"You don't like the guy, do you?" he asked, referring to Phil, with the same weird tone as before.

"No, Phil is ok. He makes my mom happy, and that's what matters. It's because Phil needs to travel a lot, and I didn't want to become a burden." I blurted out what more than I intended to. But that was partially true.

"So, you moved here because you wanted, I see." he said with his back turned to me. "Do you like it? I mean, until now?"

Oh, he caught me. I would never be able to like this little boring rainy town. I decided to lie a bit more.

"It's… ok. I didn't have much time to really see it yet. It's just my second day here in Forks." I said, and I could hear how badly I lied. I've been spending my summers here since I can remember. I knew the city very well. I didn't like it.

We were inside the woods behind the school now. Wow, I didn't even notice that we had walked this far. I almost couldn't see the school anymore. I turned to ask Edward where we were, but as I turned, he was so close to me that it startled me, and I fell on the floor. I could see that his eyes were pitch black. My mind raced. Why were we here?

"I'm sorry about this." he said, regret overflowing his voice. Sorry about what? What would he do to me? As I got up, he approached me, and I stepped back, my back now touching one of the many trees. "I'll make it as fast as possible. I'm so sorry."

He sounded like someone that would commit suicide because of something he did. He was facing the grass, looking really ashamed of what he was doing. If I run now, maybe I can reach the school before he does. That, of course, if I don't trip. He was coming near me, I had to do something.

"You won't feel anything, I promise." he said. That moment I tried to punch him in the face, but he was incredibly fast and grabbed my wrists, locking them together. I didn't even see his arms moving. How did he do that? I could feel the panic rising.

"What are you going to do to me?" I asked, trying to earn more time to think of a way to escape. But as if he could read my mind, he said:

"Don't try to run or escape, or anything else. You can't. And it will only make things more difficult for you." he said, pressing me against the tree. "It will be over before you know."

Was he trying to assure me? Trying not to make me scared? If he was really going to do something bad to me, why didn't he just do it, instead of trying to calm me down by apologizing? Maybe, by now, there would be someone looking for us. We didn't show up to our class, and I'm sure that guy called Mike would be looking for me. I could scream.

But Edward was faster again. He put his hand over my mouth and nose, preventing me from screaming, and from breathing too. Beginning to feel light headed, I could also feel my lungs grasping for air. "I'm so sorry, I really am, but it can't be helped" he said again, looking like he was about to cry. As I blacked out, all I could think was "Why?"

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A/N: So?? What do you think about it? Should I continue it? Was it interesting? Please review and let me know if you have any suggestions, or if you find any mistakes, so that I can correct it!

Thanks for reading: ) and please Review!


	2. Chapter 2

A/N: Thanks for those that reviewed my last chap.!! It made me want to continue… ;) So… THANKS AGAIN !! Well, here we go. This one is epov

_**What If…?**_

_**Twilight FanF**__**iction Chapter 2: EPOV**_

The way she kept blushing whenever I asked a question didn't make things any easier. I couldn't even think clearly when the owner of that wonderful scent that would ruin my life was so close to me. During class, I thought about so many ways of attracting her to a place that I could end the burning in my throat. It was easier than I imagined. She followed me and didn't look around once. She trusted me to take her to class, and I would do this to her… She didn't even know that her life was about to end.

While I was listening to her talking about her mom, the way that she talked about her, with such kindness, hit me. I remembered my father's face, so controlled, so calm. He would never blame me for what I was going to do. And that would just make me more ashamed of it. But the monster inside me was stronger than I thought. I had to do this. She was so… appealing. All I could think about now was me tasting that smell, her hot blood running down my throat.

"You don't like the guy, do you?"I asked her, with the impatience in my voice showing up a little. Keep walking Edward, she hasn't noticed where you're headed yet. We were almost in the woods now. Just a few more steps. I had to keep her distracted.

"So, you moved here because you wanted, I see." I said still facing the woods, afraid that if I turned I would lose control of myself. I had to gain more time, so I kept asking questions. The breeze that was blowing while we were walking helped me to think more clearly.

"Do you like it? I mean, until now?" I knew Forks could be a little boring for a teenager. But she didn't sound like any teenager I knew. Maybe that was why I couldn't hear her thoughts. Maybe her head didn't work the same way as the others'.

"It's… ok. I didn't have much time to really see it yet. It's just my second day here in Forks." She said, blushing again. Control yourself Edward. Just a little further. I was surprised that she was lying. Anyone that had a brain would notice it. But why did she even bother to lie to a stranger? Anyone normal would be ranting by now.

We were in a safe spot now. No human would see us here. I wondered if Alice would have seen something at this point. She's been worrying about Jasper too much recently. I came closer to Bella, but it startled her and made her fell on the floor.

"I'm sorry about this." I said, as if it would make things better for her. I took a step closer. Her scent was making me more aggressive. "I'll make it as fast as possible. I'm so sorry." I said again, remembering about what this selfish action would do to my family. My mind was about to explode.

"You won't feel anything, I promise" I said, trying not to make her scared. But why should I care about her? She was ruining my life, so why was I trying to be nice?

I saw Bella eyeing the school behind the trees. She looked like she was really thinking about a way to escape. But what really shocked me was that she showed no fear. She tried to punch me, but I caught her wrists before she could break her hand in my face.

"Don't try to run or escape, or anything else. You can't. And it will only make things more difficult for you." I said, losing my patience. I pressed her to the tree, to prove my point. "It will be over before you know."

She didn't say anything again, looking like she was in deep thought. Why wasn't she screaming, kicking, at least trying to break free? I put my hand over her mouth just to make sure that she couldn't scream. She kept looking in the school direction, maybe hoping someone would see us. That made me feel terrible again. I would destroy an innocent girl that didn't do anything wrong, that was just in the wrong place, at the wrong time.

"I'm so sorry, I really am, but it can't be helped" I said, the guilty taking over me. If I could cry, I'm sure I would be crying by now. She was beginning to pass out, and as her chocolate brown eyes closed, I could see the question in them. I laid her unconscious body on the ground. Just finish it fast Edward. I looked at her. She seemed so calm, as if she was sleeping. That made me want not to hurt her, but the burning in my throat got worse as the seconds went by.

I kneeled beside her, grabbing her right arm. I brought it closer to my nose, just to feel her once more. Her scent wasn't like anything that I had ever felt. She smelled like lavender, no… freesia, I think. Her skin was soft and warm, and almost as pale as mine. But my thirst could not wait any longer.

I bit her wrist, letting that wonderful warm liquid run down my throat and sooth the ragged itching on it. It was even better that I imagined. It was like drinking water after a month of thirst. She was… delicious. More than that. I couldn't stop.

I saw her arm shudder weakly as I sucked more blood. When I saw that, my saner thoughts came back for fraction of time. But it was enough to make me think about what I was doing again. Regret took over my feelings. I let her arm fall on the floor with a low thud. What was I doing? I just took the life of this girl just because it pleased me?

I was a terrible monster. And I couldn't go back in the past and just don't do it. I took her life, and there was no coming back this time. I should die. I should be destroyed. I didn't deserve existing anymore. I took a few steps to get away from her lifeless body.

I needed to talk to my father. What should I do now? They would find her sooner or later. I needed to take her somewhere else. I took her body in my hands and took off running. She wasn't even cold yet. That made me feel worse.

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A/N: So, did you like it?

Please let me know what you think !! Review please!


	3. Chapter 3

A/N: YAY!! Another chapter! Thanks for the kind reviews! A virtual chocolate chip cookie was sent to all of you ;). Enjoy!

_**What If…?**_

_**Twilight FanFiction Chapter 3: EPOV**_

I was running as fast as fast as I could. Carlisle would be home at this time of the afternoon. He would know what to do. Her body was getting colder and colder as I run. How could I have done this? She didn't do anything. When she woke up, she had no clue that this would be the last day of her life. I was such a monster. Everything was a blur. I could barely feel my feet touching the ground. I had to get home.

I could already see our house between the woods. I ruined our life this time. Here we could almost be 'normal', if we ever could be considered that. Even if we couldn't really be friends with humans, we were all accepted here.

When I reached the front yard, I called my father's name. He was by my side a second later, with a worried expression on his face. As he saw what I was carrying, his expression changed from worried to confused.

"What happened, Edward?" he said, worried again. I didn't deserve him. He was being too nice to me. "Who is this girl?"

I collapsed onto the ground. I couldn't take his kind tone anymore. I should be accused, judged. I let her body kindly on the floor, as if I could hurt her anymore than I already had.

"I killed her. I did it." My voice was barely louder than a whisper. I wanted to kill myself. When I was thinking about ways of taking her away, I thought this would be easier. I thought that I would end the craving for her blood and everything would be ok. I didn't expect this feeling of shame that was so evident in me. Why did I regret doing this so much? I didn't know her, I couldn't be sad for losing someone I didn't know.

But then I remembered. She had people that would miss her. She was the chief's only daughter. The few times I had been near him, his thoughts were very silent, as if he wasn't there. But I bet he was a good father, even if he didn't show it. I now, I had took her from him. And her mother. The way she talked about her like she was the grown up, it was different. I would always cause pain to someone.

"Calm down, Edward. Come on, let's get inside and discuss this." My father said, touching my back, encouraging me to come in. I took her body once more in my arms, and noticed that it was as cold as I was. When I went through the door, I met my family's anxious eyes. Rosalie's anger, Alice's, Emmett's and Jasper's confusion, and the worst: Esme's worried gaze.

I laid Bella's body on the couch. I hadn't noticed that her face showed pain. I caused her pain before dying. I felt guiltier now.

"What happened?" Carlisle asked again.

"I couldn't resist. My self control was worse than I thought. Her smell was so appealing." I said between quick breaths, as if I needed them. I couldn't face my family right now, so I was looking at my feet.

The worst came. I could hear all of them having different reactions.

Rosalie was fuming. 'How could he! We were adapting fine in this town. There's almost no sun, we could go out in the day. Now we'll have to move and start over. He ruined everything.'

Alice's thoughts were a little better. 'But… I didn't see anything coming. How did I miss that? We could've stopped him.' She was blaming herself.

Emmett was just… Emmett. 'Relax little brother. Everybody slips sometime.' That made me feel worse.

Jasper was distracted controlling the room's feelings. 'Well, at least it was not me', he thought while sending calming waves towards us all.

Esme was, again, the worst of them. She couldn't blame me for anything. She was too kind. 'Poor Edward. I bet he had a hard time controlling himself. And the thirst must've been terrible!'

Carlisle cut my thoughts. He was pacing around the table in the living room.

"Did anyone see you?" he asked, looking at me again.

"No" I was sure. "I scanned the thoughts of other students while I was walking her to the forest. No one paid enough attention to us, because we were the last ones to leave the room."

"Ok, that's better. Does she have family that will be looking for her?" That question hit me once more.

"Yes, she had." I said, regret again in my voice. "She was the police chief's daughter. It was her first day at school, but I saw some students talking to her. What are we going to do about the body?" I asked, concerned about our safety.

Carlisle seemed in deep thought. After a few seconds he answered in his always-calm voice.

"We should take it somewhere far from here, but not so far that no one will be able to find her. We just need some days, to keep our appearance, but her body will be found after we've left."

How could he be so calm? My head was about to explode. I was going to make my family go through the adapting phase again. This was the most difficult for us. And all because I couldn't get a grip of myself.

Alice started apologizing, as if this was her fault, not mine.

"I'm so sorry. I didn't see any of this coming! How could I let such a thing escape my head?" Alice said, truly meaning it. Esme put her hand on Alice's shoulder, comforting her. We were all quiet, thinking about our future. And to think that it all happened about twenty minutes ago...

Then, we suddenly heard it.

An agonizing scream came from the couch, startling all of us.

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Cliffy!!

What will happen next??

Please review if you have any suggestions, or just to say hi!

Thanks for reading!


	4. Chapter 4

A/N: I hope you liked last chapter! It's always cliffy, I know… but I just can't help it! THANK YOU, kind reviewers!

So, here it is, the fourth chapter! When I first started writing this, I didn't have a clue that I could make this far! XP

_**What If…?**_

_**Twilight FanFiction Chapter 4: BPOV**_

I was in the dark. I couldn't see or feel anything anymore. I couldn't even hear my heart beating. Was I dead? No, this couldn't be death. It was so… lonely, so silent. I thought that after death I would go somewhere that I liked. Maybe I died and went to hell. Being condemned to spend eternity alone in the dark was really bad. But what did I do that I deserved to come to this place?

Then I saw a light. A bright shining light, and all I could see was white. I tried to touch this light, but my body didn't move, and my fingers were far away from it. It was as if my body was moving by itself. I felt my legs getting up, and suddenly the light was gone again.

Now I could see a forest . I saw Edward Cullen running through the woods with an inhuman speed, carrying a girl's body. He was desperate, I could see it in his face.

Why couldn't I remember anything clearly? I remembered my first day at Forks High School. It was better than I expected. I remembered asking Jessica about the Cullens. I remembered Edward's murderous gaze toward me in Biology. My confusion when he offered to take me my next class. But everything after that was blurry.

It was like I was watching a mute movie. Edward arrived at a beautiful house in the middle of a meadow. A handsome man with blond hair, which should be in his thirties, came to welcome him in the front door. Edward collapsed onto the floor, still holding the girl like he was protecting her from something bad. As I thought that, he put her in the floor beside him.

His beautiful face was in pain. He looked like he was about to cry. Like he regretted doing something. It rung a bell. I was sure that I had seen this scene before, or at least a scene very similar to this one. I could remember his face from somewhere.

Edward and the man got up and went inside the house, taking the unconscious girl with them. I thought about following them, but in the exact moment I thought that, I was already inside with them. I saw all the Cullens from school, the blond man, which I assumed that was their father, and a woman, just as beautiful as the others, with a worried expression.

They were discussing something, I could see it in their faces, but I couldn't hear anything at all. Just this uncomfortable silence. Their faces showed different emotions. The pixie-like girl, the big one with brown curls and the blond boy seemed very confused. The gorgeous blond looked like she would rip someone's head off. And the woman, which I thought was their mother, had a very motherly worried expression.

They talked for some more minutes, and then everybody didn't move their mouths anymore. They needed time to think, I guess. Edward looked awful, and I mean his emotions. He could never look bad.

This was so weird. Why was I having this dream? Was it really a dream? And why couldn't I hear anything? Not even the sound of my own breathing… What was happening?

My silence was interrupted. I could hear my heart, beating loudly against my chest. The scenery that I was floating over was still untouched. The noise was getting louder and louder, until I couldn't think because of the it. I looked around, but none of them seemed disturbed.

For the first time, I looked at the girl lying on the couch. I was surprised to see that the girl was… me.

Suddenly I felt it. My wrist was burning. I tried to shake the fire off my arm, but I couldn't move. The pain was getting worse. It felt like there were flames running through my veins, and I couldn't do anything about them.

I wanted to scream, but my mouth didn't move, and my voice didn't come out. I wish I were in that dark and lonely place again, instead of feeling this pain. I would bear spending eternity there just to stop this agony. Please, someone kill me. I beg you! Anyone… I tried to scream again.

But this time I found my voice. I came back to reality, like coming from under the water after almost drowning. I screamed as loud as I could. The pain was spreading through my body faster. I opened my eyes to see if there was someone there to help me. As I flashed my eyes open, I saw all the Cullens standing around me. They were looking at me in total astonishment. I should be dead, I thought. I wish I were.

The pain was overwhelming. I closed my eyes again, as if I could leave the pain outside, and I screamed as if it would take it away. I was beginning to remember everything that had happened, that had leaded my life to this exact moment. I remembered everything.

But what had Edward done to me? I remember passing out, but what did he do that caused this burning in my veins? Why didn't he just kill me? Why?

Besides the pain, I could feel cold hands holding mine while I was screaming.

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Liked it?? I had a hard time describing it… but it is ok now! Please review, and feel free to correct any mistakes!


	5. Chapter 5

A/N: Hey guys! Here it is! Another chap.! Please forgive any mistakes, because while I'm doing this, my throat hurts like hell… Maybe I'm a thirsty vampire!! No… I'm not :( Ah, Thanks for the reviews again!

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_**What If…?**_

_**Twilight FanFiction Chapter 5: EPOV**_

When we turned, Bella was screaming louder than I'd ever heard any humans screaming. He body was shaking and her eyes were wide opened. I was by her side in less than a second. Her hands were burning now, and I could hear her heart like it was beating inside my ears. She was alive. But that didn't make me any less guilty.

Carlisle had a shocked expression. His thoughts were the same question as mine, being repeated again and again: How? How was she alive? I felt her cold body against mine. In her chest I could hear nothing but silence. How did her heart start beating again?

Carlisle was the first to break through the screams. He ran to his room and was back in half a second, holding a syringe with a translucent liquid.

"Morphine" he said, holding Bella's arm to apply it. I helped him with that. "It may ease the pain."

Bella screamed again. Her voice was broken because of the effort to breathe. She kept shaking her right arm with the rest of her strength.

"Please someone help me! FIRE! Please take it AWAY!" tears from pain were running down her face, staining her cheeks. I didn't know what to do. I could end her pain if I wanted… But I couldn't take her life away again. If she survived my venom, she would be turned into a vampire, but did she want that? Wasn't that worse than death?

I held her hands like there was no tomorrow. She seemed unconscious now. The morphine was working. Maybe she didn't have to suffer. This was the first time Carlisle could try it. He had always been wondering if he could had had decreased our pain, but never had the chance to really try it. We couldn't know if she was in pain anymore.

Her body was too stiff. I heard her heart, pouncing slower now. Her face was pale in an unhealthy way. What had I done? Condemning an innocent girl to an eternity of thirst and never living normally again… This was the best proof that I was a monster.

Rose was glaring at my direction. She didn't really accept the fact that she was stuck in this life, and giving the girl the same destiny as us was the worst crime to her eyes. It was for me too. I can't believe that creatures like us deserve something after stopping existing. That's why our hearts don't beat anymore. We've lost our souls.

I heard Bella mutter something under her ragged breath. It sounded like… my name. Yes, she said my name, she was repeating it. She should be having nightmares because of the pain. I should be terrifying her once happy dreams. Her once happy life.

--

"Edward, you need to hunt", Esme said from the doorframe. I shook my head. I wouldn't leave her side until it was all done.

"I don't need to." I said not taking my eyes away from Bella. Carlisle said it wouldn't take long, and her chance of 'surviving' was high. He said that her heart was very strong. But it didn't change the situation. I caused this, and I as couldn't go back in time and prevent things from happening, I would do my best to make it better for her. I was the only one responsible.

"Aren't you tempted by her blood? It must be almost impossible to hold yourself, Edward. Hunting would make things a little easier." Esme said kindly, trying to persuade me. But it wasn't enough.

"I deserve the suffering, but my venom in her blood makes it less appealing. I will stay here."I said again.

At some point she left the room, only to be replaced by Alice. She put a hand on my shoulder, only to be shaken off. It was difficult to be near Alice. I couldn't bear her visions of Bella in the future. They were becoming clearer, and she could tell that it wouldn't take much longer. But her opinion about her… was ridiculous. How could she think about beauty in times like these? She kept repeating it, as if to shove it in my face. 'She'll be gorgeous', that's what she thought.

The problem was that she was right after all. I saw it in her mind too. Bella would be the most gorgeous vampire I've ever seen. In a different way than other vampires, and I couldn't explain why. I wanted to kill myself every single time that thought crossed my mind.

How could I even think that? I doomed the poor girl to this life of an endless night. Well, it was not like we suffered every moment, it was the opposite. We had a lot of great moments, my family and I. But sometimes, when we had to move, or to start in a new school, it wasn't a normal life. And trying to live with the ones that should be your prey… that definitely didn't help.

And when she realizes that she can't see her family anymore? How will she react? She'll be too different, too dangerous. Most of us didn't have anything to lose, but she did.

I could hear her heart speeding. It was coming to an end. How would she react when she woke up? She would be completely lost. Imagine being dropped in a new life, totally different from your previous one, a world that you believed that existed only in horror movies. It was like being hit by reality for the first time. I could remember.

Would she accept our style? When human, she looked like a pretty reasonable person, but when you notice the thirst, everything changes.

Would she ever forgive me? I didn't want her to, though. I deserved her eternal hatred. But I would do everything that she wanted. I would be her slave, if she wanted to. Just to pay a little for what I've done.

I called the others. It was almost time. We would need everybody to hold her, just in case. She would be stronger than all of us, for a year, at least. And more emotionally unstable too.

And then we heard it. Her heart came to a total stop. She slowly opened her eyes. Everything would be very different. I didn't blame her for taking sometime to understand it all. Bella turned her head, still lying down, and looked at us. I couldn't hear her thoughts, nothing changed about that.

She immediately jumped from the bed and got as far from us as she could, baring her teeth.

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A/N: This was a little longer than the last one… Hope you enjoyed it!

Oh… and Please Review!!


	6. Chapter 6

A/N: Hey guys! Thanks for the reviews! They really make me want to write more! Yesterday I realized that I never put a disclaimer in this so…

Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight… because if I did, Edward would be mine… and I wouldn't share him.

_**What If…?**_

_**Twilight FanFiction Chapter 6: BPOV**_

The pain in my heart was getting stronger. Why couldn't I move anymore? I had to bear the pain, and do nothing. Now it was like my heart was taking the pain from the rest of my body and concentrating it on itself. It felt like it would explode.

The pain made me want to scream, but I couldn't. Two days ago, I heard a man talking about morphine, but it didn't ease my pain. It only took my ability to move, and it was frustrating.

These two days felt like years. I counted the ticking that the clock made, trying to distract myself from the pain. 200345, 200346… it never ended. I was surprised with my counting. It felt natural, and I never lost it. Was my brain working faster?

But there was something else. I could feel a pair of hands holding mine in them. They were cold in the beginning, but now the felt a little warm. I could also count the breathing from this person that never left my side. Who was it? I knew it was one of the Cullens, but which one? It couldn't be Edward, I thought he hated me. I heard his voice, but I just couldn't believe it.

The pain got the worst it ever had. All in my heart. I couldn't think about anything but the pain.

And it just stopped. It was so sudden that I was still making an effort to scream when it stopped.

I heard seven different patterns of breathing. The clock was still ticking. But I couldn't only hear it. I could hear it's inside working. I could hear the birds moving their wings. I could hear the sound of a small river, not too far from where I was. Everything was so… noisy. I was too distracted by the pain that I didn't hear anything before.

I turned my head towards the breathing. I was able to move now. I slowly opened my eyes, afraid of what was waiting me. Then I saw everything.

It was like I was a blind person that was seeing the world for the first time. All was colorful, clear. I could see everything. I could see the fibers of the bed's sheets. I could see the light coming from the window, divided in the seven colors of the rainbow, and an eighth color that I couldn't name. It took me a while to remember that I wasn't alone. I turned in their direction.

My instincts took over my mind. I bared my teeth and a low growl escaped my lips while I was jumping to the other side of the bed. Wow, I was fast. Why was I this fast? Why could I see and hear much better now? And why was I growling? This was not me. I wasn't an animal… Or was I?

"Calm down Bella, we mean no harm." the blond man of my dreams said very carefully, as if to not irritate me. Did I look that dangerous? I could see that the guys were in front of the girls, prepared to protect them if the needed.

"What is happening?" I said trying to control my voice. It sounded different. Like bells. It worked, I felt calmer now, but still very confused. He took a step nearer me.

"I am Carlisle Cullen, Edwards and the others are my children. You've been sleeping for two days, and while that happened, your body went through some changes." he said slowly, for me to understand. He didn't need to, though. I could understand it all perfectly. But why did this happen?

"What caused these changes?" I asked, my voice and temper in total control now.

"You see Bella, we are not like the others. We are not human anymore, and you've become one of us."

I looked at the others. They were more beautiful now, with my improved vision. They weren't expecting me to freak out anymore, because their bodies were relaxed now, except for the blond boy in front of the pixie girl, which was still prepared .

"What are you? I mean… us. What are we?" I managed to ask, totally confused now. Not humans? So what…?

"We are what some call 'cold ones', but we are known popularly as Vampires. We drink blood Bella." he said, looking serious. When he said that, I felt my throat burning. I needed to drink something. My hand went automatically to my neck.

"You kill people?!" I said, taking a step back. "No, I won't do that, you can't force me to!" The blond boy took a step further.

"We don't" I was interrupted by Edward. "We live on animal blood. We don't harm humans" he said, looking at his feet, and murmured something, so low that I couldn't understand.

"Where is my family? Do any of them know where I am? What I am? I need to tell Charlie that I'm ok, he and my mom must be freaking out by now…" I said while walking to the door. I needed to make sure that they weren't worried about me. I could finish asking questions later.

But I was interrupted by Carlisle, that was blocking the way now.

"You can't Bella. I'm sorry. You're too dangerous, and they can't know about our world." He said with an apologetic face. But why? I didn't feel dangerous. I didn't even feel thirsty until someone reminded me of it. I needed to do this! Charlie and my mom must be thinking that I'm dead. I was here for two days, for heaven's sake!

"I fell ok! I am in control of myself!" I said again, trying to convince them. Why were all of them worried about my temper?

"Bella, newborn vampires tend to lose their temper very easily. When they do, they hurt whoever that is near them. Do you want to hurt those you love?"

I shook my head. I didn't want that.

"Besides, it is better for them to think that you're dead. Safer. No human should enter our world. It is too risky." Carlisle said, explaining things for me.

"Am I ever going to be able to see them again?" I asked in a low tone, afraid that my voice would break.

Carlisle shook his head, looking at his feet. "I'm so sorry Bella, but I don't think so."

I knew I would cry. I started sobbing, but no tears filled my eyes. I couldn't cry anymore? Dry sobbing felt worse that crying. Where were the tears?

"Why did you do this to me?" I managed to say between sobs. "Why?"

Carlisle gave Edward a meaningful look. He came closer to me, his eyes full of regret.

"I did this. It's only my fault, please don't blame my family. I couldn't resist your blood, it had the best scent I had ever smelt. I'm so sorry." he said looking at the floor. He took my hands. "But I'll do everything to make this less difficult for you, I promise. No, I swear."

I sharply took my hands away. He did this to me, to my family. He didn't deserve my pity. He ruined my life. He ran his hand thought his hair, with a pained look on his face. I didn't care. Carlisle started again.

"Well Bella, I think I should introduce everybody to you. This is Esme, my wife." He said looking at the kind looking woman. "These are Emmett, Rosalie, Jasper and Alice, that I consider my children. You already know Edward."

The big guy and the blond girl were Emmett and Rosalie. I knew they were a couple, just as Alice and Jasper, the pixie-like girl and the blond boy that, I've noticed, had scars all over his skin.

"Carlisle." Jasper said, looking at me.

"Oh, Bella, your thirst must be really annoying. Jasper things that you should go hunting with us. He would be calmer when you've had hunted." the word 'hunting' sent shivers through my spine. I knew it was just animals, but…

I didn't notice the thirst until they pointed it. I didn't really want to do it. I didn't want to be a vampire. I wanted to see my family, and tell them that everything was alright. I felt very controlled. Edward broke the silence.

"Cool it, Jasper. She doesn't act like a newborn. In the beginning, remember that she growled at us, but saw our faces, and then stopped?" he said still not looking at me. "I still can't hear her thoughts, though."

The pixie girl, Alice, came from behind Jasper's back, and took my hand. She had a funny smile on her lips.

"Come on, let's go hunting, it will be fun." she said, dragging me to the door without any more words. She was surprisingly strong for someone so small. All I could think while I was being dragged was 'Why did this happen? Why did Edward need to be attracted by my blood? Why?'

A/N: Liked it? Please don't think that this is the end, there'll be more!! Next one is EPOV :D

Please review to make the author happy! ;)


	7. Chapter 7

A/N: You guys are so kind! I live on your reviews!! XD

Disclaimer: No, I don't own twilight… goes to a corner of the room and starts sobbing

_**What If…?**_

_**Twilight FanFiction Chapter 7: EPOV**_

Bella was sobbing in the floor now. She must have discovered that we can't cry when she lightly touched her eye. I was making her suffer. She wouldn't be able to see her family anymore. When I was changed, I didn't have anything to lose, but she did. She lost her former life.

"Why did you do this to me?" she said between sobs. "Why?"

Carlisle looked at me. 'It's your turn Edward, she deserves to know the truth.' he thought. He was right. It was my task to tell her what I did. I didn't want her to blame my family for doing something when they didn't have any fault.

"I did this. It's only my fault, please don't blame my family. I couldn't resist your blood, it had the best scent I had ever smelt. I'm so sorry." I said looking at my feet. I couldn't handle looking at her face. She was so pained. But I couldn't do anything about that, it was irreversible. But I could try to make her life better. I took her hands in mine. "But I'll do everything to make this less difficult for you, I promise. No, I swear."

Even if it took my life, I would make it up to her. No matter what it takes.

Bella took her hands sharply from mine. I deserved it. She hated me. Carlisle started introducing everybody to Bella. I could hear all thoughts, but Rosalie's were the ones accusing me. Now she wasn't the only one that was unhappy with being a vampire.

Alice's thoughts were annoying me. I could see her visions about the future just as well as she did. She had an image of her and Bella holding hands, laughing. The place was a bit blurry, but that made me a little happier. She would be laughing in the future. I would make everything within my reach for this vision to come true.

"Oh, Bella, your thirst must be really annoying. Jasper things that you should go hunting with us. He would be calmer when you've had hunted." Carlisle suggested, right after I heard Jasper thinking about her unnatural behavior. He was right, no newborn acted like she did. She was very conscious about her behavior, her temper was in control, and she stopped her emotions I the middle of its course. It was amazing.

"Cool it, Jasper. She doesn't act like a newborn. In the beginning, remember that she growled at us, but saw our faces, and then stopped?" I said, making Jasper a bit calmer. "I still can't hear her thoughts, though." I said again, but this time mostly to myself.

Bella didn't look at me anymore. I wish she would forgive me… no Edward! You don't deserve it, you deserve her hatred.

Alice came from Jasper's back, with that sly smile on her lips. She was carefully hiding her thoughts, translating a part of the dictionary to Russian. What was she planning? She took Bella's hand and started dragging her to the door.

"Come on, let's go hunting, it will be fun." She said trying to make Bella happier. Alice could come with the most devious plans, but she could be a great supporter when she wanted.

Bella went with her with no more words. I followed silently, afraid to scare her. I was coming to make sure that everything was ok with them. That was what I was telling myself. In some seconds we were in front of the river. Bella risked a glance at me, just to turn again when she saw that I was following them.

She seemed insecure with her new developed speed. Alice saw that too.

" Fast, isn't it? Do you want to run with me? It is easier to adjust the speed when we're running." Alice said with a kind smile.

"Ok" Bella murmured shyly. And then they took off running.

Alice was giggling all the way. She enjoyed running as much as I did, but she wasn't as fast as I was. I was the family's runner. I kept a safe distance from them, controlling my speed.

It was when we smelled it. A strong and sweet scent came from the south. Oh no. Bella felt it too, and took off running in its direction. How could I have forgotten to check if there were any humans here? I started chasing Bella.

She was fast, but not enough. I was easily catching up with her. She noticed it and a growl echoed in the woods. I couldn't let her make this mistake.

"Bella, don't! It is a human!" I jumped on her, forgetting her weird self control. I was midway in the air when she stopped and buried her head in her hands. But I couldn't stop the movement in time. The last thing I saw was her shocked face before we both collapsed on the floor. I ended up on top of her.

It was when I looked in her recently acquired crimson eyes. They held the same deepness as they did when they were brown. I stared at them for about two seconds when I realized what I was doing and jumped to my feet. Alice was by her side in a second.

" Oh, we are so sorry Bella! We forgot to check before coming! And I didn't see anything at all. But it isn't that weird because my mind was focused on other things… But how did you stop?" Alice said too fast that no humans would understand. Bella looked to her feet. If she was human, she would be blushing by now, I think.

" He warned me. And I just stopped." I noticed that she didn't say my name. "I can't believe that I was chasing a human!" she said looking ashamed of herself.

" Well, why don't we eat something before anything else happens?" Alice said walking the other way. Bella and I followed her.

We soon caught the scent of a pack of deer and some mountain lions. This time I went fist and killed a mountain lion. I offered it to Bella, but she refused with a sharp 'No, thank you'. Good, she didn't even want my help. Making up would be difficult with her stubbornness. But I had much free time.

A/N: Sorry to disappoint those who wanted bpov in this chapter, and apov too, but the idea came in epov…

I still don't know in which pov next one will come… Let me think… :D

Please hit that cute blue button and review!


	8. Chapter 8

A/N: I'm so, so, SO sorry for not updating in a while!! This week I had a biology test, a math test, a geography test… I really needed to study… but to make up to you I guys, I made this chapter a little longer! Enjoy!!

_**What If…?**_

_**Twilight FanFiction Chapter 8: BPOV**_

Why did he have to follow us? I knew that we would be fine just by ourselves. She was being nice to me and we didn't need his help. I was beginning to be sure that Alice and I would become good friends. If I really had to go through this, I could try to enjoy it.

Alice was right when she said that it was easier to adjust when running. It felt wonderful to run freely, to feel the wind in my hair, without worrying about tripping or hitting something. It almost made me forget about what I was, about the family I wouldn't see anymore. Almost.

It was when it hit me. I couldn't hear Alice giggling anymore. A strong and sweet scent invaded my mind. It made my mouth water with something I knew that wasn't saliva. My senses took over me. I needed to taste what had the marvelous scent. I ran to the source like there was no tomorrow.

In the middle of the way I felt footsteps behind be. I growled at them. No one would stop me from reaching my food.

"Bella, don't! It is a human!" the part of my mind that I still had control over heard Edward's voice saying. Those words triggered my reaction; I stopped when they hit me.

But it was too late for Edward. When I buried my head in my hands, trying to clear my mind from the scent, he was midway in the air, and fell on top of me, knocking me to the floor. I looked up and met those golden eyes staring deeply into mine. He seemed amused, and for one second I forgot where I was. But then he stood up, breaking the trance.

If I were still human I would be blushing now. That was one thing that I wouldn't miss. It always made more embarrassed when I blushed. I saw Alice come dancing in my direction with a worried expression.

"Oh, we are so sorry Bella! We forgot to check before coming! And I didn't see anything at all. But it isn't that weird because my mind was focused on other things… But how did you stop?" she said looking like she was paying attention to other things. What did she mean by 'see'?

"He warned me. And I just stopped." I said, embarrassed because I remembered Edward on top of me. But then I remembered his words. I was about to attack an innocent human. I became a monster. Carlisle and the others were right when they said I couldn't see my family anymore. I was indeed too dangerous. I was ashamed.

"I can't believe that I was chasing a human!" I said, threatening to cry again. But I bet Alice saw that too.

"Well, why don't we eat something before anything else happens?" she said, walking towards the place we came from. Edward and I followed her. He was looking down all the way, in deep thought. It was easier to hate him when he wasn't looking at me. He really seemed sorry about what he did to me when he looked at me. But I was trying not to pity him.

Hunting was easier than I thought it would be. We soon caught the scent of some animals, which, I later learned, were a pack of deer and some mountain lions. Edward was still trying to make up to me, and offered me a mountain lion that he caught. It smelled way better than my deer, but I refused. He wouldn't buy me with so little effort. I bit my deer.

The sensation was very good. The hot liquid soothed the pain in my throat. The taste was wrong, but it would do for now. I caught one more deer and one mountain lion until my thirst was at least muted for now. I now knew that the thirst was an inescapable part of my new life.

When everybody was ready, we headed back to the house. I was surprised by the way Edward and Alice hunted. They were so graceful; they weren't even dirty after hunting. Not a hair out of its place. I looked like one of those trash movies' actress. My clothes were stained with blood and ripped in many places, but they looked just as if they never hunted.

We went inside, and Alice showed me to my new room. It was big and blue, reminding me of my old room in Charlie's house. I shoved that blurry memory away. I had to forget them.

My room had a big white bed and white curtains. There was a mirror in the wall, and I was surprised to see my reflection on it. I see that Hollywood wasn't totally right. That thought made me smile.

"Do you like it?" Alice asked shyly, standing under the doorframe

"Yes, I do. Thank you very much Alice. You're making this easier to me." I said, truly meaning it.

"No problem! You are our new sister, aren't you?" she said smiling at me.

I shouldn't blame anyone from my new 'family' for this, except for Edward. They were being very nice to me. They could've just left me here alone, but they didn't. I should be grateful for that.

After changing in some clothes Alice gave me, we went downstairs. When we passed Carlisle's room, I overheard some of his conversation with Esme.

"Edward was faking an illness to stay with Bella while she was being transformed, but the others went to school. As Emmett told me, even her mother came from Phoenix to help with the investigations. Her parents are helpless." he said with sorrow in his voice.

I took it better than I thought. I tried not to think about my mom anymore, I didn't want to cry now. I should be strong, for those who were taking care of me not to be worried. In the living room Emmett tried to distract me with Chess. He was very good and tried to teach me some of his tricks.

When Edward came into the room, I pretended that he didn't exist. I continued playing with Emmett, and then Rosalie. She was pretty good too, but not like Emmett. She was nice too, like all of them. But she had a weird sympathetic hint in her eyes.

Edward sat on the piano. He was handsome indeed. The way that he ran his hands on the ivory keys was grabbing my attention. For a moment I forgot what he had done to me, and just enjoyed the melody. It soothed my ragged feelings towards him. I could understand a little about what he had done to me after hunting. The way that human smelled was indescribable. But I stopped, didn't I? Why couldn't he have stopped too? I knew that my self control was not like a newborn's, but he wasn't a newborn anymore. He should be able to control himself.

Edward finished the song and looked at me. I didn't realize that I was still staring at him, until his eyes bored into mine. I turned my head like it had been shocked. What was I doing? I should hate him, not admire him. He turned his face too, to glare at Alice.

"Alice, stop thinking that." He said in a tone that reminded me of a parent telling a child not to do something. I looked at him with curious eyes. How did he know what she was thinking?

"I can't help it. You know it will happen. Never bet against me." She said in a sweet tone, which seemed to annoy Edward. What the hell were they talking about?

"But it wasn't one of your visions. It was one of your wishes!" he replied not looking at her.

"Alice, what are you two talking about?" I asked, more curious that ever. She eyed me, and then remembered something.

"Oh! I forgot you didn't know! Well, the fact is that some vampires have special abilities. I see the future." she said matter-of-factly. What??

"What?" my words echoed my thoughts.

"It depends on people's decisions. If someone changes its mind, my visions change." She said like it was the most common thing in the world. Wow, the future. Maybe I could ask her some things.

"Edward has a gift too." she said interrupting my thoughts. "He can hear other people's thoughts. That's why we were arguing." she explained. I panicked a little. Did he hear all bad things I thought about him? The bad ones and the… good ones. Shoot, I should be blushing. I regretted thinking all that about him. Maybe he was a good person after all. My thoughts must've hurt him… Edward interrupted me again.

"But for some reason, I can't hear yours." he said, and for the first time I saw that it bothered him a little. It made me smile inside. Was I allowed to think that he looked a little cute when he was annoyed?

"What were you thinking, Alice?" I said, trying to distract myself from my thoughts of Edward. She giggled a little, looked at Edward once more and then returned her look toward me.

"Trust me Bella, you don't need to know. Not now, I mean." She giggled once more and then took my hand and walked to the stairs.

* * *

A/N: Well… that took a while. Maybe I will be updating a lot next week, we have a week with no classes, because will be a holiday here in Brazil…( Yes, I'm brasilian if you didn't know. :D) So be prepared!

Please leave your review! I really wanted to reach 100 reviews… It would make me VERY happy! ;)


	9. Chapter 9

_**What If…?**_

_**Twilight FanFiction Chapter 9: EPOV**_

When I came into the living room, Bella was playing chess with Emmett. I still couldn't believe that Emmett acted so goofy when he was so smart. I bet Bella thought that too, seeing that he was so good at chess.

She was still ignoring me. I wish she would just yell at me or something like that. So I could hear what she's thinking. It was so frustrating that I couldn't figure out any of her thoughts. I started playing the piano, so that I could distract my mind from her.

Rosalie was playing with Bella now. Her thoughts were just as annoying as when she was saying them aloud. She wasn't talking to me, because of what I did to Bella. Rose thought that Bella would be as unhappy as she was. I wouldn't allow that. When I saw Bella laughing in Alice's vision, I decided it.

Without even realizing, I begun playing Esme's favorite, but I was with another melody forming itself in my head. It reminded me of Bella someway. I should try this later.

I finished the song and looked around, meeting Bella's crimson eyes. She was staring at me, and this time, it wasn't with hatred. I felt surprisingly happy when I noticed it. I returned the gaze, losing myself in her eyes.

Bella suddenly turned her face, her former expression vanishing from her face. What was she thinking? I would give anything to know it, just to see what she felt about me. Wait Edward. What the hell are you thinking? You don't even know her, and she hates you, she hates you! You don't have this right. My thoughts were interrupted by Alice's.

'I knew it! It is surely going to happen!!' she thought, and with all her excitement she let her guard down, exposing the thoughts that she had been hiding from me. I couldn't tell if they were visions or not, but they were there. I could see Bella and me holding hands, laughing inside Alice's head.

I felt confused. Were those visions, or mere wishes that Alice had? Was this going to happen? I felt the urge to stop Alice; I didn't want to be hopeful. Hope… was it this feeling that I had?

"Alice, stop thinking that." I said, while my thoughts were screaming 'Is it true??'. She realized that she let it escape and thought: 'Shoot, now he knows! I wanted it to be a surprise! Well, whatever…'

"I can't help it. You know it will happen. Never bet against me." She said aloud, with a pixie smile on her lips. 'It's very clear Edward.' she added mentally. No, it couldn't be true. Bella hated me!

"But it wasn't one of your visions. It was one of your wishes!" I said with an annoyed tone. I was in denial. 'It was a vision, Edward.' Alice said mentally again, but with a more serious tone this time. She wasn't kidding… I can't believe it. Bella interrupted me before I could ask more.

"Alice, what are you two talking about?" Bella said with cute curious eyes. I mean… curious eyes.

It took half a second for Alice to remember that Bella didn't know anything about our powers. She didn't know anything about us yet.

"Oh! I forgot you didn't know! Well, the fact is that some vampires have special abilities. I see the future." Alice said, like she was commenting on the weather. Bella's eyes became wide.

"What??" she said looking at Alice with her mouth hanging open.

"It depends on people's decisions. If someone changes its mind, my visions change." Alice started explaining. Bella's gaze was focused on her wonderings now, but Alice interrupted her.

"Edward has a gift too. He can hear other people's thoughts. That's why we were arguing." She said, stifling a giggle that Bella didn't see.

When she learned that I could hear thoughts, Bella's facial expression changed from ashamed to embarrassed. If she was still human, I'd bet my Volvo that she would be blushing. I really wanted to know what she was thinking. What thoughts would make her embarrassed if I heard?

"But for some reason, I can't hear yours." I tried to make things clearer. That fact made me annoyed once more. I saw her relax the moment I said it. She seemed happy for some reason.

"What were you thinking, Alice?" Bella said, curious again. I glared at Alice, sending her a message. I would prevent her from shopping for a year if she told Bella her vision. She giggled when she got it, and looked at Bella again.

"Trust me Bella, you don't need to know. Not now, I mean." The pixie said, thinking of our laughing image again, now that I had already discovered. Alice took Bella's hand and walked to the stairs. I couldn't help but to follow them. Bella kept asking questions about our powers.

"Can you see human futures too, Alice?" she asked again, paying attention to Alice.

"Yes, but not as clearly as I see vampires." she answered looking at Bella's wardrobe. We were inside Bella's room now. Was I allowed to be here? Alice opened it and began searching through it in vampire speed. But Bella wasn't paying attention to her clothes.

"Do all vampires have a gift?" she asked, again. This time I was the one who answered.

"Not all of them." I stopped to look at her. She didn't seem bothered by me, so I continued. "In our coven, only Alice, me and Jasper have special abilities." But she looked at Alice to ask more. I thought I was doing fine.

"What does Jasper do, Alice?" Alice answered without looking up from Bella's clothes.

"He can feel what the others are feeling, and he can also influence the feelings from the ones near him." she said and then squealed. "I found it!! Bella, try this on."

I saw what Alice had in mind for Bella. She was playing her favorite game, dressing Bella up. But she was hiding the future from me again. Bella spoke again, with the pieces of clothing in her hands.

"But why do some vampires have powers and others don't?" she asked, looking a bit distracted by her clothes. I gave it a try again.

"Carlisle thinks that we had some preeminent power when humans, and when we became vampires, they became stronger. For example, jasper was good with talking to people and making them fell what he wanted them to feel. Now he can manipulate feelings." I said and stared at her, waiting for an answer.

"Oh, I see." she said looking thoughtfully to her clothes. Before I could say anything else, Alice shoved Bella into her bathroom.

We waited half a minute outside the bathroom, Alice hiding her visions all the time. And then Bella came out.

I think that my face that moment was really funny for all of them. It was a mixture of surprise and amazement. My mouth fell open. Alice giggled and thought: 'I told you. Never bet against me.'

Bella was wearing a blue silk dress that enhanced her pale skin and heels that made her legs longer. I couldn't stop staring. If my heart was still beating, it would have gone wild.

"Alice, why did you make me wear this?" Bella asked in confusion. Alice was stifling laughs behind her tiny hands.

"No special reason, I just wanted you to see some of your new wardrobe." Alice answered between laughs, looking at me. I realized that I was still staring, and looked away. What was this feeling? I never felt like this before. Why did Bella cause this reaction in me?

**A/N: SOOOOO?? Did you like it? Or do you think I'm going too fast?**

**Don't forget to review :D**

**P.S.: From now on there will be just one AN at the bottom… I realized I'm boring!! Sorry for taking your time before! XD**


	10. Chapter 10

_**What If…?**_

_**Twilight FanFiction Chapter 10: BPOV**_

I was putting on the clothes Alice gave me thoughtfully. What Edward had said about vampires with special powers made me wonder if I would have any gifts. Maybe my self control was my gift. That would be good enough. All my life I had been nothing but average. Being more controlled that the others was a good thing. I finished changing and looked at the mirror in my new bathroom.

Staring at me was a gorgeous girl with long legs and a beautiful pale skin. Was that me? Being a vampire had changed me so much. I looked the girl in the eyes. I expected to find my old and dull brown eyes to comfort me, but instead I found a pair of crimson orbs. I jumped back a little. The eyes were scary, and reminded me of a cat that would attack a little mouse.

Would my eyes change colors? I noticed that every single member of the Cullen family had golden eyes. Why were mine blood red? I went out and looked at Alice. She had golden eyes. And so did Edward. I noticed that Edward was looking at me with a funny expression. Was I… pretty? I never thought that. But I ignored him and turned to Alice.

"Alice, why did you make me wear this?" I could see Alice hiding little pixie laughs behind her hands. What was she laughing about? I wish I had Edward's power just for a few seconds.

"No special reason, I just wanted you to see some of your new wardrobe." she said, looking at Edward. I followed her gaze and realized that Edward was still looking at me. He turned his head as soon as my eyes met his. Alice interrupted my thoughts again. I noticed that she did that a lot, but that didn't annoy me. I really liked her.

"Bella, why don't you change back and help me find an outfit for school?" she said and I got the impression that she didn't really need my help, but I followed her anyway. Soon we were inside Alice's room, which had a huge closet. I was trying to discover if her closet was bigger than the room itself when Alice shoved Edward out of her door.

"Get out, we're going to do girl's stuff, so boys aren't allowed." she said and closed her door on Edward's face with a loud bang. Ouch, that must've hurt. But who cares, he shouldn't be following us around that much.

"So, Bella, what do you like doing in your free time?" Alice said, trying to start a conversation. I was happy, the silence that formed itself while she was searching thought her closet began to fell awkward.

"Well, I mostly read." I said, not remembering anything else I liked doing in my free time.

"Edward likes to read too. I suppose you two are bookworms." she said with a chuckle, not taking her eyes from her clothes. I didn't like the comparison. I wasn't trying to like him. I shouldn't even try to forgive him… should I? Maybe I should. But not because I wanted to make him happier. Alice noticed my lack of answer to her comment.

"Bella, please take it easy on him. He was the most controlled of us, except for Carlisle, until you showed up." she said, as if she had read my mind. "He almost killed himself when he realized what he had done to you. He really didn't want to do that to you. Well, imagine the scent we caught while hunting."

I didn't want to do that, but I did as I was being told. My throat started burning immediately. But I just hunted! How could I be thirsty again?

"Now imagine that scent five times stronger. It was just like you smelled to Edward." I couldn't imagine that scent any stronger. Maybe Edward wasn't a monster after all. "His instincts took over his mind, and he hadn't any self control left. I was surprised that he didn't kill the whole class." Alice said looking at me this time.

I felt ashamed about my behavior. Maybe I should have had accepted the lion he offered me… he was trying to be nice. Wait! You can't forget that he did this to you, Bella, whichever were the conditions. Alice squealed and jumped up and down:

"Yay! I found the perfect outfit! We always need to be well dressed, no matter where we are going, don't we?" she said mostly to herself. I kept staring at her. How could she be so serious in one moment, and then change to hyper in the next second?

When Alice talked about school, I got a little sad that I couldn't go too. Even that I didn't like school that much, it represented normality to me. My life wasn't normal anymore… Alice changed her mood again.

"Bella, when you are around Edward, please keep in mind that the guilt he feels is enough payment for what he has done with you. I know it might be difficult, but please try." she said before her usual smile returned to her face. "Now, time for school!!"

With that, she danced her way to the door and disappeared. She left me thinking about the subject. Should I be nicer to Edward? Maybe he wasn't that bad. I could give him a chance.

I went downstairs and bid everyone goodbye, except for Edward, that stayed home. Esme questioned him about that.

"Edward, why aren't you going to the school? Bella is already fully transformed and you can leave her side." she said with a motherly tone that I couldn't help but to notice.

"I don't feel like going today. And I have a melody forming in my head that I wanted to try to put into music." he said looking at the piano I saw him sitting on earlier. Esme's face lit up when he mentioned the piano.

"Oh that's great! It has been ages since you last played, I mean, apart from this morning. I'll be in the garden, but when you're finished, please call me!" she said and reminded me of my mom when she started a new hobby; so exited, eyes gleaming in the light. I pushed that thought away. Edward chuckled softly, because of Esme, and went to his piano.

I wandered in the living room, looking at all the books on the shelves. I picked one that I had never heard of and sat at the couch. I was in the third chapter when I heard it. A sweet lullaby was coming from the piano, which I hadn't ever heard. It was beautiful, and I couldn't concentrate in my book anymore. I gave up and turned my head towards the source of the sound. There sat Edward, elegantly running his hands on the ivory keys. I felt something that I had never felt. What was this feeling?

It was all very new to me. I looked at Edward and felt… warmth? I just wanted to come closer, but I didn't. What is this feeling toward Edward?

A/N: Mwahaha, I am mean and I'll finish this chapter here…

Now we celebrate! Tenth chapter, huh! It is getting long, indeed… ;D

Don't forget to review!!


	11. Chapter 11

_**What If…?**_

_**Twilight FanFiction Chapter 11: EPOV**_

I sat down at my piano, the new melody flowing inside my mind. I gently put my hands on the keys, closing my eyes. I pressed the first chord, the sound filling the living room. I opened my eyes and looked around.

There sat Bella, reading a book peacefully. When I looked at her, I knew exactly what the music would sound like. It would sound like a lullaby. I resumed pressing the keys, and much to my amazement, Bella stopped reading her book and turned her head in my direction. I continued playing as if I hadn't noticed that her attention was on me.

As I played, I realized that my inspiration for this music was Bella. Every time I pressed one key, I thought about Bella. About how I wanted to make her happy. And also… about her image when she came out of her bedroom wearing that blue dress. Blue was definitely her color.

The song was drifting to an end, with sadder chords finally ending it. I didn't want to think of a name for the song, because I knew that if I named it, it would certainly have the word 'Bella' in it. I called Esme, that was working on our garden. She loved when I played something new.

Esme was in the room in less than two seconds. She took off her gardening gloves, that weren't dirty at all.

"You finished it already? It usually takes longer for you to finish a song." she said, while wondering why in her thoughts.

"I had a good inspiration this time." I said, listening to Esme's questions in her head. "I prefer not to say this now." I said before she could think anything else, and eyed Bella for a minimal fraction of a second. Bella didn't notice anything, but Esme got the message.

I started playing my new song once again. I changed small things, to make the song more beautiful, but the idea remained the same. I could hear Esme's thoughts while I played. She was… happy? I searched more deeply in her thoughts, to discover why. And I found something I didn't want to.

I finished the song and looked my mother in the eyes. The reason of her happiness was that she thought I was… in love. How? _I_ didn't know if I was. Was I? And the most important question: Was it showing that much in my face?

"Is it that obvious?" I asked her, not looking in her eyes. It was not possible. All my life I thought I was complete by myself. I never really looked for love. But now I felt… differently. When she entered my life, I thought that the only reason I wanted to be near her was because I wanted to make up to her.

But I was beginning to see that it wasn't just that. Esme smiled and hugged me. She was absurdly happy. She has always thought that I should be with someone, that my life was too lonely. She once said that Carlisle changed me too early, that I was just a kid. She was truly happy for me.

Maybe Alice was right. Maybe this was going to happen. I could picture me with Bella. But I was going to have to make her like me. When vampires start feeling something about someone else, it is stronger and more unchangeable than human feelings. It was absolute.

I loved Bella. And nothing would change that. I was in love with the one who hated me. That will be difficult.

Esme pulled away from the hug and asked:

"Do you have a name for this beautiful song? she asked me, looking at my piano. Yes I did. But I just couldn't say it aloud now, with Bella in the room, looking curiously at us. I had to lie.

"Not yet." I lied, but it sounded like the truth. Bella couldn't know that I wrote something inspired by her. Bella's Lullaby… It could be. It's kind of lame, but it will do. "Do you have any suggestions?"

"What about…" Esme looked at the ceiling, thinking for a while. "A simple 'For her'? It is a little bit like Beethoven with Für Elise… But if you don't like it, please don't feel the need to use it." But I would. It suited the song perfectly. But maybe I could improve it.

"I really liked it. But what if we add 'I will' after that? It would be 'For her I will'." I said, risking a glance toward Bella. She was still looking at us with soft curious eyes, so I returned my eyes to Esme.

"Perfect!" she said and asked me to play it one more time. After we were done, she took her gloves and headed to the garden. Bella returned to her book and I had nothing else to do, so I took a book randomly from the shelves. Ok, I admit, I didn't want to leave her side. Stupid Vampire feelings.

I sat down and looked at its cover. _Wuthering Heights_… Terrible book, but I had nothing better to do.

"It was a really nice song." I heard a voice coming from the other couch say. I looked up and saw Bella, looking at her closed book. Was she… starting a conversation with me? I felt happy inside.

"Thank you, I had a good muse." I said, hoping that she would notice who I was talking about, and at the same time, hoping not. She continued looking at her book, so I tried to keep our talk.

"Do you like classical music?" I asked her. She nodded, not taking her eyes from her lap. Isn't she going to say anything? "Do you have a favorite?" I asked, hoping that I knew how to play it. She lifted her head.

"Claire de Lune" she said. It hit me like and arrow in my chest. Her favorite was my favorite too. Of course I knew how to play it. I went to my piano again while she just stared at me.

I started playing Debussy's Claire de Lune and looked at Bella.

"Debussy to this?" I said not taking my eyes from her face. She nodded and smiled a shy smile. I wanted to make her smile more. She was even prettier when she smiled.

But suddenly her expression changed. Her face was sad and her eyes looked like she would cry, if that was possible. She wrapped her arms around her legs and rested her head on her knees, softly sobbing. I was at her side at the same moment.

"Did I do something wrong?" I asked kneeled in front of her. I ruined a perfect moment where she was smiling. That will be definetly difficult.

"My mom used to play that on our piano." she managed between sobs. Oh god. I sat by her side and put my arm around her shoulders. I squeezed her against me, as if I could take some of her pain away.

"I'm sorry. I'm truly sorry. For everything." I said, and I could not forgive me for hurting her again. She didn't push me away, so we just sat there for I don't know how long. I couldn't bear seeing the woman I loved in pain.

**A/N: Eddie finally ****admitted his feelings for Bella!! I know… it was high time he did. We're in the 11****th**** chapter, for god's sake! Blame him for being slow, not this cute author over here… :D**

**P.S.: Sorry for the lame song name, but when I was writing, I was listening to 'For you I wil', by Teddy Geiger. Cute song... XD**

**People, you should already know it. Reviews make me write faster. So you job here is to leave a review!**


	12. Chapter 12

_**What If…?**_

_**Twilight FanFiction Chapter 12: BPOV**_

After a weird conversation with Esme, Edward sat on the couch in front of me. I was still wondering about their conversation. What I could grasp was that Edward wrote the song for a certain someone, and that Esme was overjoyed with this fact. It would be really difficult to get used to his mind-reading powers. I only heard half of what was said.

At the same time, I couldn't stop thinking about the melody Edward had just played. Every single inch of me was filled with that song, and it wouldn't let go. It was like the melody was part of me. It soothed my feelings and when it was being played, I forgot who I was and where I was.

I thought about what Alice had told me. She asked me to be nicer to Edward. I could try.

"It was a really nice song." I said, not looking at him. I didn't need to be the nicest person in the world.

"Thank you, I had a good muse." he said, and even when I wasn't looking at him, I could hear the smile in his voice. He was happy about it… was he in love with someone? He certainly was… It was very clear when he talked to Esme. I felt sad inside when I thought of Edward loving someone, and I didn't know why. Was I jealous?

No… I couldn't be. Why would I be jealous? I didn't like Edward or anything. Did I? What was that feeling that I had when I saw him playing the melody? It couldn't be anything more than admiration. Yeah, it was only admiration.

"Do you like classical music?" Edward brought me back from my thoughts. I simply nodded. Classical was my favorite genre. "Do you have a favorite?"

I didn't even have to think about it. My answer came out in the same second.

"Claire de Lune" I said, and Edward smiled a huge smile. Why did that make him happy? He immediately stood up and went to the piano. He started playing Debussy's familiar song and I felt a smile creeping up my face.

"Debussy to this?" Edward asked. I nodded and kept smiling. I let the song flow, and closed my eyes. It made me feel calm and happy. It brought back many blurry memories from my human life. I could see my mother's face in them. I missed her so much… but I promised myself that I wouldn't cry anymore.

In my old memories I could hear the same tunes that were being played again. I saw Renee happily playing it in our secondhand piano. She didn't play it as perfect as Edward did, but it didn't matter. I liked to see her happy. I thought about how my 'death' had affected her. I couldn't bear seeing her sad.

I could feel that I would cry again. I mean dry sob. I put my arms around my legs and rested my head against my knees. I tried to sob as low as I could, but soon I heard the song abruptly stopping. I heard Edward kneeling beside me. He waited some seconds before speaking.

"Did I do something wrong?" he asked with a sad tone in his voice. Maybe he was a good person after all. He really seemed to care about me. I choked my answer between sobs.

"My mom used to play that on our piano." I said, and cried more when I said the word 'mom'. I felt someone sitting by my side, and arms wrapping me, squeezing me against its owner. I felt the impulse to shake them off, but my body didn't respond. I felt very safe there, and I started calming down.

"I'm sorry. I'm truly sorry. For everything." I heard Edward whispering, and I believed it somehow. His tone was so true I couldn't doubt it, even if I wanted. We sat there for some time, I don't know how long. I felt so comfortable there… Ok Bella, this is starting to get weird.

I moved a fraction of an inch and Edward's arms flew away from me. It was an awkward moment. I didn't look up, and I could fell his gaze on me. I looked up and met his golden eyes staring intently at me. He locked his eyes with mine and I couldn't look away. We stayed like this for some seconds and he broke the connection. If I was human, I would probably be deep scarlet and my heart would have gone crazy. I tried to ignore the sensation.

Suddenly Jasper entered the room, with a weird expression on his face. He eyed Edward meaningfully. I suppose they were having a mental conversation again. I wish I could read minds, so that I could know what was making Jasper so annoyed.

"It was not an 'explosion of love', Jasper." Edward said very annoyed, his fingers quoting the air.

"Ok, so what was it?" Jasper said lightly teasing. Explosion of love? Could someone explain it?

"Give me a break, Jasper. I just discovered my feelings. It is not my fault that you can feel it too." Edward replied, and I caught a quick glance towards me. Didn't he want me to know who was her? Jasper eyed me and returned eyes to Edward.

"Yes, it is." Edward said, probably answering Jasper's thoughts. Gosh! What are they talking about? With that, Jasper looked at me, smiling hugely. He winked at me, and just left. Edward rolled his eyes.

"So, are you feeling better now?" he asked, looking at the floor, maybe trying to change the subject. He was worried about me.

"Yeah… Thanks for… you know…" I couldn't find the words. I thought about him embracing me, and that made me feel embarrassed.

"Anytime." he said with a warm tone in his voice. I felt comfortable talking to him now. Maybe I forgave him, I thought. I didn't feel all that hatred anymore. "So… do you want me to play anything else?"

"You don't need to." I said smiling at him. I was afraid I would end up crying again. For some reason I didn't want him to be worried about me. He smiled back in the same moment. "I wanted to continue reading my book."

"What are you reading?" he said, while I picked up the book I left on the couch.

"The first edition from a book called Wuthering Heights. It is very good." I said looking at the book on my lap. He chuckled. "Why are you laughing?"

"Do you really think that this book is good? I personally think that it is awful." he said with amused eyes. How could he think that such beautiful love story is awful?

"Why? The story is so pretty!" I protested, trying to defend the book in my hands.

"They simply ruined each other's lives." Edward said with a smug smile playing on his lips.

Yes, but what the book tries to show us is that the true love can make it worth it! That's what makes the story so breathtakingly beautiful…" I said a bit too happy. Edward chuckled some more.

"I guess you're right… I just never saw it this way. You changed my perspective." He smiled a warm smile that made me want to touch his face. Why did his actions affected me so much? The only thing I could think about now was who was the one he fell for? Maybe it was someone from school. Maybe it was a vampire I didn't know… It didn't matter. I was feeling jealous anyway, no matter who it was. Why was I feeling this??

My thoughts were driving me insane. Edward looked at me curiously. I was so glad he couldn't read my mind. I was starting to realize something that I didn't want to be true…

I was falling for Edward, and there wasn't anything I could do about it.

**A/N: Firstly, I would like to deeply apologize to guys! My life has been utterly hectic, I can't take it anymore! Next week I have 7 tests, and I am so screwed… I have to study a lot, so you won't hear about me for a while… ( But I'll write in every free second that I have XD**

**Secondly… What did you think about this chapter? Bella is beginning to realize her feelings too!! YAY!**

**Thirdly, PLEASE LEAVE A NICE REVIEW!! I would really appreciate that 8D**


	13. I'm very sorry

Hi to those of you who still hold any consideration for my story. I know I have been a most terrible fanfic writer as I let you on hold for these past two years, without even giving you guys the news that this story would be on a temporary hiatus (I think you noticed it). My life since I stopped writing _What If_ didn´t let me have any time to write anymore, my last years of high school were very busy, with no time to do anything but study. Now that I'm finally through them, I am officially off school, but I have entered college now, so that leaves me with no available time again.

The other reason why I stopped _What If_ is because I have long lost the spark which kept me writing the story in the beginning. Sometimes, when writing takes you through a different path than you intended to go, you get lost and don't have any more passion for what you were doing. It was also very hard to keep on going when my hots for Twilight had gone away. If I had once been a huge fan of it, it went away as these yeas have gone by.

Anyway, I would like to thank all of those who were faithful readers and accompanied me until the last chapter. The kind reviewers that fueled me to write and the ones who even markes my soty as a favorite deserved an end to the story, as they were the reason I wrote until chap. twelve, but I can't go on.

You guys from _fanfiction . net_ were the best, and I owe my work to you.

Thank you from reading, from the bottom of my heart.

Paula Kakimoto (previously known as _Kaki-Chaan_)

Ps: for those of you who like Pride and Prejudice, there is an idea which has been nagging me, so I will try to upload a fanfic in my holidays (even if I haven't written anything down yet.)


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